Quite possibly one of these sweetest things to see in this world is a couple who are still happily married after 30 or 40 years. To see an older couple look into each other's eyes with such love and respect is something that can melt almost anyone.
Because that's the way we were designed, we were all created with a strong desire to be loved, cherished and cared for.
Its quite understandable too that people in such relationships wish to share that happiness with others.
But the truth is that in the world we're in, that is not a common occurrence. Its so rare that newspapers will feature couple's who get to a 30th anniversary. Its so rare that single parents and step families are the norm.
Thus it should come as no surprise that I am going to refuse to allow myself to be pushed into or out of a relationship without knowing exactly what I'm doing! I already did that once and it hurt like mad, plus I'm independent enough to not allow anyone to make my decisions in such important matters for me.
However I do feel a tad guilty for pretty much going off the deep end at some innocent (they're never truly innocent) little old ladies the other day. They had started a conversation about some young men I know (these particular young men, have never and will never enter into my mind as potential mates!) and how these young men are planning on staying single to keep keep lives simple. They then started discussing a young couple I know who got married and had a baby immediately and how married life is. At which point they turned to me, yes 7 sets of inquiring little old lady eyes pinpointed on the only young lady (ok so I'm not that young, I'm 24, but in amongst them I'm a young'un) in their midst who happens to be single, and asked "What about you Amelia, will you stay single or get married?"
Now you gotta understand this is a major sore point for me.
On the one hand we have my parents, who are dead set that I am single for life after that nasty breakup at 19. I understand where they're coming from, they watched their happy little girl meltdown in the center of what should have been a good time, rebel for a while, then come back to her senses as a bossy and very determined woman. They don't want me to get hurt again (and neither do I), I totally get it. My parents are happily married, but they know its not common.
On the one hand we have my parents, who are dead set that I am single for life after that nasty breakup at 19. I understand where they're coming from, they watched their happy little girl meltdown in the center of what should have been a good time, rebel for a while, then come back to her senses as a bossy and very determined woman. They don't want me to get hurt again (and neither do I), I totally get it. My parents are happily married, but they know its not common.
On the other hand I have family members and friends who have been happily married for a long time and cant bear to see anyone single. A certain family member happens to mention this every single time I see them. They dont just mention the fact that I'm single and "need to get married now before I get old", but regularly tell me about eligible bachelors, just in case I need to know where to find them. It has gotten so far that they are now telling me about "reputable dating websites", and every time I see them saying "you've been on ***** website havent you?", when I say no, they tell me I'm lying.
UGH, I have not been on that website, I'm not interested in a flipping dating website, or in the guys you are attempting to match-make me with!
UGH, I have not been on that website, I'm not interested in a flipping dating website, or in the guys you are attempting to match-make me with!
So yes, when those poor "innocent" little old ladies asked me about if I want to get married or stay solo, I instantly replied "that I don't want anyone matchmaking me!" and walked away.
The truth is that I do want the happiness that those happy loving couples have, and here's a little secret (secrets are made to be told, right) I do have a guy who I'm watching at a safe distance. But I'm scared of the pain that could happen if I choose wrong, and there's no way anyone is getting the details!
To my guy friends, don't worry, if I've contacted you in any way over the last month, its not you.
Joe Jackson once had a song which makes me think of this whole scenario.
"Happy Loving Couples"
I've just been to see my best friend
He's found another girl
says she's just about the best thing
in the whole damn world
And he says, "cant you see
what the little lady's done to me?"
Says it like he thinks I'm blind
but the thing that you see
aint necessarily the things you can find
Happy loving couples make it look so easy
Happy loving couples always talk so kind
'Til the time that I can do my dancing with a partner
Those happy couples aint no friends of mine
People say I'm too damn fussy
when it comes to girls
Happy couples say
I must live in a lonely world
Wanna be, wanna really be
what my friends pretend to be
Be it in my own good time
Being kind to myself
'Til I become one of two of a kind
Those Happy loving couples make it look so easy
Happy loving couples always talk so kind
'Til the time that I can do my dancing with a partner
Those happy couples aint no friends of mine
You Aint no friends of mine
You aint no friends of mine
You what I mean
Happy loving couples
In matching lamb turtle-neck sweaters
Reading Ideal Homes magazine
Yeah!
Wanna be, wanna really be
what my friends pretend to be
Be it in my own good time
Being kind to myself
'Til I become one of two of a kind
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